Friday, October 24, 2008
Fullness = Lazer
Overall = Jonathan
Honorable Mentions: Joe & Logan
Thanks to all who came out and supported them!
Winners received crowns and medals while all competitors received bic razors covered in glitter. Happy shaving, if you should so choose, beard-a-knights.
Fortunately, the awards ceremony was captured on film, and will be posted sometime soon. As promised, the overall winner, Jonathan, will be the featured beard in the film.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
So rather than attempt to convince the judges of the, admittedly few, merits of my beard, I will simply bring forth evidence of precisely what I'm up against. This is an inherently biological contest, and I believe a distinct genetic handicap should be taken into account when judging the participants. Behold:Yep, this enthusiastic lad with the cherubic visage is many things, none of them a natural beard grower. Those sweet, pink cheeks are ready to be stuffed full of fudge, not sprout the manly bristles native to the faces of so many outdoorsy types, metal guitarists, and homeless gentleman. It's a wonder I've come as far as I have. And for that, I deserve something.
1. Homeless man look - From the photographic evidence, I'm clearly the most in need of a cup of soup. Seriously - spare anything?
2. Patchiness - even my patches have there own sense of style. that salt and pepper look that you see coming on? Pure style. It's more like salt and brown sugar. Sweet.
3. Loggins-factor: I am not going to feather my hair, but I have seen every episode of Yacht Rock, including the uncut versions.
As determined by Lizz and the criteria committee:
Fullness: minimal patchiness, good overall face/neck coverage, fills in the blanks pretty nicely
Length: um, use a ruler
Overall: minimal patchiness, strong overall face/neck coverage, consistent color and texture, softness valued over prickly, a je ne sais quoi quality, inspires world peace, reminds you of Kenny Loggins in his good days
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Sunday, October 19, 2008
I look forward to shaving as soon as possible, probably Thursday evening, if not sooner. I seek to return to modest humility and objectivity (or a release from narcissism), that characterizes the mark of a mature individual and one capable of loving (Fromm).
Monday, October 13, 2008
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Hi Team Amazing,
It is me, Lazer Hahn, in Telford, UK. Wish you all were here! I spent one night in a London hostel and then took a train here the next day. I am in Telford for one more day and then I will fly to Dublin, and then from Dublin to Chicago and probably then spending time in the SuburbsOf before I make my return to Urbana.
The beard continues to grow even though I am not in the States, how unusual. Please someone explain this to me.